Belinda Says Hay: “Belinda’s Business Decision”



Hello. It’s Belinda.

Today is my second-most exciting day on the job.

I took a big risk and it paid off. The company is using one of my ideas on the holiday calendar today.

That’s right. As I mentioned last week, the special bundle for Day 10 is brought to you by yours truly.

I can’t believe it.

So why is this so risky? Because ever since my roommate warned me I’m probably due for a performance review, I’ve been trying to lay low. I figure if I just quietly do my job, they’ll forget about it. Whole thing will blow over.

But I couldn’t do it. Too restless.

The thing is, my job has been changing a lot lately. I’m asked to pose for more and more photos. Standing with props like I just happened to come upon a red sleigh or a pile of tissue paper.

“Act jolly, Belinda,” they tell me. “Pretend to wrap presents and we’ll make a video.”

That’s another thing—acting. I don’t have any training for that. I hear “stage left” and I don’t know where to go. End up blowing my cue and it feels just like Daylight Saving Time, humans taking time and space and flipping them every which way.

It confuses a rabbit and that’s what I am: A spokesrabbit. Not a spokes “model.”

Nothing wrong with standing in the same position for 15 minutes or pretending I’m merry. I can play along. Just not my strength.

And though I’m really not sure what my job is, I want to be judged by my ideas. I know what rabbits like.

So I stuck my neck out and suggested a bundle for the holiday calendar. I said that speaking as a rabbit, my expert opinion is that Josh needs to rent a second warehouse to stock up for this bundle. That’s how high the demand will be.

And now it’s time to “put the hoe to the row,” if you know what I mean.

If my bundle is a hit today, I can stop worrying about this performance review business.

If it’s not a big seller, I guess I’ll take the company car and head to Kentucky. To help Josh in the second warehouse.

Because helping J. is my other strength, as I proved on Saturday, Oct. 14, 2017, otherwise known as Midwest BunFest.

Which was my most exciting day on this job.

Sincerely,

Belinda

Spokesrabbit, Small Pet Select