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Belinda Says Hay: “Vampire Update”

Belinda the spokesrabbit blog: Vampire Update

Hello. It's Belinda.

Well I feel silly.

Two weeks ago, I wrote about my roommate's odd behavior. 

Lying on the couch all night. Lights off. Reading her phone. 

Next thing you know she's coming and going at all hours. 

Of course Little Fang had to complicate things. Deciding there was only one explanation. 

Our roommate is a vampire. 

Little Fang started to ask me a lot of questions about bats.

And talk in her sleep. Yelling "bleh! bleh!" like Dracula.

Come on. I can't focus on my work with all that noise.

So I decided to do a little “spy work" to settle it once and for all.

One night, after my roommate gave us our bedtime treat, said good night, and turned off the light, I didn't doze off on my sleeping rug.

Instead I waited a bit. And listened.

I could hear her talking to the English through the vents. That meant she was on the bedroom level.

It wasn’t easy walking across my room and up the stairs in the dark. But I did it.

I crept across the kitchen floor. "Like a church mouse."

Then into the dining room and around the corner to the living room. I followed the baseboard with my whiskers until I was tucked behind the couch.

Again, I waited.

I could hear water running upstairs, in the bathroom. Then the water stopped. 

More chatter at the English.

I expected my roommate to come downstairs and leave the house at any moment. But time dragged on and on.

My eyelids felt heavy. I shook my ears. I couldn't fall asleep. Not after making it this far. 

But I couldn't help myself. I nodded off.

Next thing you know, I heard the front door close. 

I opened my eyes. Where was I? How long was I asleep? 

By the time I realized I was dozing behind the couch, I heard the storm door close outside. My roommate was gone.

Impossible to tell what time it was from my hiding spot.

I fell back asleep for a bit and when I woke I had a new problem. I was thirsty.

I like to keep my water bowl near my sleeping rug. Sometimes a rabbit needs a "sip or two" in the middle of the night.

I didn't see a water bowl anywhere near the couch. And I didn’t want to come out until the coast was clear.

Not sure how long I debated. Maybe 10 minutes, maybe an hour. 

And the more I thought about it, the more I wanted a drink of water.

Finally I decided to just “go for it.”

I backed out and started walking toward the dining room. At that exact moment I heard the storm door squeak.

My roommate!

I froze. 

She pushed the front door open and entered the house. Then she turned on the light.

Cold air moved across the floor. It smelled so good. Nice and fresh.

“Belinda! What are you doing up here?”

I started grooming my face. I tried to act casual, as if I always “hung out“ in the living room in the middle of the night.

“I was just out for my morning stroll. It's so nice and quiet before the sun comes up."

Then she went on and on about the reason it's nice and quiet is the world is still asleep. And that spokesrabbits should be asleep too and not "skulking around the house." 

I won't bother you with the details but you can imagine.

Eventually she took off her coat and tossed it onto the couch. Then she disappeared into the dining room. The lights came on.

I followed. By the time I entered the kitchen, she was standing at the top of the stairs to the bottom level. Her hands were on her hips.

She didn’t say a word. She didn't have to.

I walked past her and paused at the steps. She reached to flick the light switch.

“Go back to bed, you naughty bunny. I’ll serve breakfast in an hour or so.“

When I passed Little Fang's pen, she gave me a look.

I’ll tell you later, I said.

If you've read this far, I want to thank you. I told you this whole thing was silly.

Anyway, I hope you have a good Valentine’s Day. Give yourself a treat

Sincerely,

Belinda

Spokesrabbit, Small Pet Select
Belinda@smallpetselect.com

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