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Belinda Says Hay: “What I Want for My Birthday”

belinda says hay what i want for my birthday

Hello. It’s Belinda.

Today is my birthday. Happy birthday to me! 

This will be a good day no matter what happens. Thanks in part to my new friends at the notary office.

I was born in 2013 so I’m five. I don’t feel five. 

Not sure how my roommate found out I was born on April 22 but she got this date from somewhere. Probably the shelter, since they wrote “New Zealand White” on my papers. 

So the date must have been on my passport or other documents for getting through customs. I don’t have any of those records now and I hate to blame the shelter but I would not misplace anything that important.

I thought I could just spend the day relaxing but get this—I have to work. My agent scheduled me for a meeting at her house. On a Sunday, which is weird.

But maybe it isn’t weird at all because the “monkey business” at work and at home has been getting worse. 

For one thing, my roommate has been sneaking around more than ever. She has no idea how loud she is.

She also forgets that my hearing is excellent.  I lived outside in the city before I went to the shelter. With all the cars and dogs you have to be on high alert. “Listen to the grass grow.” 

I don’t want to live like that at home but my mind has been jumping every which way. Lately I’ve been taking my half-naps on the bottom floor by the furnace. So I can listen to my roommate through the vents.

I hear things like “Earth Day cards” and “invite more rabbits” and “blocked from Facebook.” Now and then my name. 

I check Facebook and sometimes I see pictures and words as usual and other times I see grey boxes. Which means I’m blocked. 

All I can think is the company is posting “help wanted” ads and they don’t want me to know. Must be starting the new rabbit with an Earth Day promo. 

If they want to hire a new spokesrabbit there is nothing I can do about it. Out of my control. 

But I’m not going to just walk into the trap, if you know what I mean. My agent wants to meet with me today and I’ll be there on time. 

But if she fires me I will be ready. And I’ll walk out with my head held high. 

And here’s why. Out on the streets, I always had an escape plan. Same idea with leaving a job. My new friends at the notary office call it an exit strategy.  

Whatever you call it, that’s my birthday gift to myself. An exit strategy, just in case. 

Here's where you can help. Although I feel funny asking for anything, I do want to “go out with a bang.” 

So if you want to give me a birthday present, share this blog or forward my email to a friend. The company watches my numbers. So even if I don’t see the big bang, my agent will.

And while that would make me feel better about all of this nonsense I’ve been dealing with, that’s not the main reason really. 

I took this job to help rabbits. There are still so many out there who never tried a pear blueberry healthy snacker or stuck their head inside a hay sampler box.  

This may be my last chance to get some snackers to them. Through their humans. 

It’s almost like I’m having a birthday party and these rabbits are my special guests.

The rest of my exit strategy is secret for now.

Thank you for reading my blog and for being my friend.



 Spokesrabbit, Small Pet Select

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