CHAPTER 250 – Owned By A Rabbit
Abigail was jolted awake from her half-nap by the sound of Dad laughing. Normally, Dad laughed when she or one of the other rabbits was doing something he thought was silly. But this time, everyone was off napping somewhere. Yet, Dad kept laughing. She hopped over to him and looked up with her pretty brown eyes inquiring, “Whatcha laughin’ about?”
Dad looked up from his phone and said, “Oh, Abigail. This is hilarious. Someone posted this on Facebook. It’s called ‘Owned by a Rabbit,’ and it’s so true. Let me read a few to you.” Abigail got comfortable in her loaf position, like she often did when Dad read Belinda’s blog to her.
Dad read on:
You know you are owned by a rabbit when…
Their grocery bill is higher than yours – like WAY higher
Every cardboard box you encounter is analyzed for its 'bunny appropriateness'
You always have electrical tape on hand
All your sheets have nibbles in them
You don't think twice when things end up with chew holes
Half your bedroom isn't yours; the other half has a bunny condo and an ex-pen – or in our case, a Small Pet Select castle and a Viper treatmobile
You have five or six buns or more - and you can tell whose poops are whose
You become obsessed with poop
You have hay EVERYWHERE – I guess we won’t mention fur or poop
You own at least two vacuum cleaners for the sole purpose of sucking-up hay and poops – in our case, even a robot vacuum cleaner
When people think of rabbits you immediately come to mind
You know what your rabbit is thinking by the tilt of their head, their ears, etc. even when others think they're just sitting there
Oh My God, Abigail, this one is so true – a customer at the vet freaks out over their $500 vet bill, and you just snicker 'cause you know that's just small change
You go to the produce store and buy absolutely nothing for yourself, only for the rabbits
Oh, and this just happened the other night – You make a special trip to the store just to get bananas
You haven't met most of your Facebook friends in person, but because you both have rabbits, you're instant friends
It dawns on you that they are actually training you, instead of you training them
Abigail, I could add a few others, like:
Your phone has more rabbit photos than anything else and you have to constantly delete other photos to make more space
When other people talk about their children, you try and relate by thinking about your rabbits
You hear a love song on the radio and think of your rabbit
You skip parties to stay home with the rabbits
You’re often late to things because the rabbits decided it was pet time
Dad just kept laughing. Abigail wasn’t sure what was so funny. It all sounded pretty normal to her. “It must be one of those human things,” she thought to herself. She closed her eyes and drifted back into her half-nap. She was glad Dad was so happy.
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